Posted by: Bert and Tania | February 14, 2010

Mosquitos are Samurai and Beg Bugs are Ninjas

Many of you will have heard of my long running war with mosquitos. And it is a war. A low-tech war involving weapons such as a fist, palm, piece of paper, book, deodourant and lighter and defences such as coils, nets, meshes, DEET and clothing. Sometimes I win. Sometimes the mosquito wins. She shows herself (only the females bite) and makes a noise so that I stand a fair chance. I hate mosquitos, but at least they fight with honour. Like the samurai.

If mosquitos are samurai then beg bugs are ninjas. They lurk totally unseen and only emerge in the dead of night. They do not confront their enemy but always stalk while their prey sleeps. They work together in large groups and try to kill you with itching. They spread like a virus and hide like cowards in the seams of bedding and garments.

Tania counted 208 bites and the pharmacist looked at me like a had the plague. I think it was the first night we’d had separate beds and Tania escaped.

I hate beg bugs more than I hate mosquitos. Buddhists should be allowed to kill both.



  1. Have you ever seen a Buddhist with bedbug bites?
    Maybe the bug code of honour involves only terrorisng meat eaters!?!
    Either become a veggie Buddhist to find out , or stick closer with Tania, they are obviously more scared of her. Or you could eat them or bottle them & sell them as wine.
    Did your friends like their scorpion wine?

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